Last night just sucked. I haven’t had an uninterrupted night’s sleep in almost a week, except for Monday night and, that night, I had a nightmare instead. I’ve been waking up fairly regularly about 3 hours into my sleep and I just can’t get comfortable. The muscles all around my diaphragm are tight. Which makes it hard to breathe. Which only contributes to whatever unconscious anxiety I already have from other things in my life.
I even took 5 mg of Valium before bed, hoping to head it off, but then finally around 4 AM, after 3 hours of laying awake and trying to sleep and then getting up and stretching and then trying to sleep, I took another 5 mg. I slept, but I woke up at 9 feeling a little dizzy and nauseous. Kind of like I had been oxygen deprived.
I’m not going to work today. This is just crazy making. I suppose I could rack it up to working 3 days in a row for the first time in 6 months, but I’m not sure that’s it. Or maybe I underestimate the freedom to move about during the day once a work week.
I’m really sick of this.