Woo hoo, it’s a crazy, beautiful spring day. We usually have one big snow storm here every April but not 2 and not this late in April. Last night, we got about a foot of snow chez moi. But by the time I left for work this morning, it was melting fast.
Now, I’m just the kind of gal who likes to pretend that she drives a rowdier car than she does. As long as I’m not careening out of control and there aren’t any other cars around, my race car/demolition derby gene comes out. (Remember, my family is from the South. 😉 Low floods provide fun opportunities for short hydroplaning. Snow plow throw-offs were put in my lane just for me to flatten. I’m crazy like that, yeah.
So, when I hit a prime stretch of obstacle course just before I got to the office, a big old grin crept across my face and little horns poked out of the top of my head. Game on. It was fun for all of about 3 seconds until I rammed enough slush heaps that it knocked my power steering belt loose. I knew this instantly because, ahem, it ain’t the first time I’ve done this. [*sheepish grin*]
So, I grabbed my can of spinach, crushed it open, and sprouted some big Popeye biceps to steer me to the parking lot. Later on, I popped the hood and found the power steering belt. (I identified it because it was right next to the reservoir cap labelled “Power Steering”.) And I tried to thread the bugger back on myself. But clearly I didn’t know what I was doing because I ended with a few more inches of belt than I used. But mox nix. My dirty hands were making me feel assuredly butch and I liked it.
So to make a short story longer, I took it over to my mechanic (stopping once on the way because the car was overheating since the water pump runs off the same disengaged belt) and threw around car terms like I knew what in the hell I was talking about. He smiled and laughed at me and fixed it for free. Again. 🙂 Because he knows I’ll be back. Here’s pimpin’ the good ol’ boys at Dave’s Autowrench.
I just love the feeling of forming new neural pathways, don’t you? 🙂
Please note that some of this info is lifted directly from the books listed at the end. These notes are for myself (because writing it down helps me learn it). If reading it helps you too, you are welcome to it, but please don’t quote me. Go to the original sources listed below.
Come to think of it, they make more sense as a pair …
(1) As much as genuinely possible, infuse every action with love. To remind myself of what this looks like, I use the image of Tita’s cooking in “Like Water for Chocolate”. Whatever she was feeling intensely when she cooked went into the food. And when the people ate it, that’s what they experienced too.
(2) Whenever someone offers me a compliment, just respond with gratitude, “Thanks for noticing.” Don’t try to qualify it, make it excuses for it, explain it, nothing. Just sit there and take it and learn to bear and integrate the energy it adds.
It’s coming up on almost a year that my self-esteem made a significant shift for the better. And I’ve noticed that people, especially men, relate to me differently these days. Or maybe it’s that it has only been since lately that I’ve been able to notice and accept how positively men respond to me. But, either way you slice it, it’s a whole new world for me.